With the half-mast tribute coming to an end, the Douglas Institute wants the people of Lac-Mégantic to know that they remain in our thoughts. Our deepest condolences go to the loved ones of the victims of this tragedy.

Lac-Mégantic was the scene of a great tragedy, and the first thing we want to do is help relieve the suffering of the victims. But how does one relieve the suffering of a person who has lost a child, a friend or a family member?

One of the reflexive responses we have as a society is to offer psychological assistance by sending in teams of mental health specialists. Unfortunately, while the need certainly exists, the ability to address these needs does not.

When I personally intervene with an individual or a family following a tragic death such as a suicide or accident, I do so with a solemn sense of responsibility and desire to help. Even though it is always appreciated by grieving families, it is still but a drop in an ocean of overwhelming grief.

This leads us to an important and somewhat disconcerting question: is psychological help useful in the wake of tragic events?

What we can and cannot do

What a victim really needs in the hours following a tragedy is to be able to talk about his or her experience. Professionals can help people express themselves without feeling judged. What professionals cannot do is impose themselves on others, no matter how much grief the individual may be going through. They are no substitute for a person the griever trusts, such as another family member, friend, or spiritual leader.

A normal reaction

Just as a car accident can leave one passenger without a scratch and another with the loss of a limb, very few events result in the same experience for two people. Therefore there is no "one normal reaction." Some people are introverted and stoical while others are taken over by emotions and cry uncontrollably. The only thing one can do is to live through these emotions. If we allow them to be felt and accept them, they will be easier to cope with as time passes.

When things do not get back to normal

While most victims are able to gradually return to their normal state of mind, some see their condition progressively worsen. They may develop post-traumatic stress disorder, which can cause them to constantly relive the initial trauma. This condition generally affects people who have experienced other traumatic incidents or who are highly vulnerable. They may begin to avoid everything that reminds them of the event. Doing so gradually erodes their self-confidence and reinforces the concept that the world is a dangerous place. They can even go so far as to find themselves completely imprisoned by their fears.

Once is enough

We can never erase traumatic events from our past. We really have no choice but to face our discomfort and resume a normal pace of life. Being a victim once is enough. Avoidance can only exacerbate the pain day after day.

Camillo Zacchia, Ph.D.
Psychologue – Institut Douglas